Survivor Building a life
by elove1991
Summary: She remembered her past but could tell no one. She was protecting her family but they didn't recognize her. She is searching for the truth trying to avoid the evil in the light. Rating for later chapters.
1. Dumbledore's Observations

Survivor – Building a life

Disclaimer: I don't own anything, wish I did I'd be rich.

Summary

No one really knows Selina Smith, she barely knows herself anymore. She is a mysterious girl, whose identity is disguised by a mixture of lies, truths and half-truths. Through all this she has to build a life for herself, after all no one can survive alone, in this world. With the help of two red headed pranksters, she will learn to laugh again, and become reacquainted with a concept that she lost years ago, happiness.

This is the first in the Survivor series.

Author's note

Just a warning, this may turn into the longest story on here, as it starts in 1989, two years before Harry goes to Hogwarts, but with plenty of Fred and George. In the plan we are going through all the books, with some stuff staying the same, but still being very AU, you'll understand why when we start getting to the book bits and things start changing slightly. However, I'm not sure if to skip big chunks of time to get to the best bits quicker, however even if I go for this route it is still going to be a very long story due to the need to set the scene and show the building of relationships. Also I have no beta, but myself so sorry for any mistakes. The rating may seem high for the beginning however, it is more for later on in the story.

The first chapter is a one off as it is from Dumbledore's viewpoint, the rest will be done with the main character Selina Smith, just thought using Dumbledore would be a better way to start to give an outside view on Selina. I'm going to try to keep the everyone in character however some stuff may seem out of character, but is just a reaction to major plot changes.

**Dumbledore's observations**

A man with long grey hair, and an equally long grey beard, look up at the orphanage, he had become quite fond of the red brick building, even with its intimidating iron gates. From here he had retrieved many students, for this orphanage seen by the muggles as an orphanage for unmanageable children, was a haven for young witches and wizards, were they could feel less isolated. Although only a handful of the children there were magical, it was a place where magic was common knowledge, although the children knew better than to talk about it outside the safety of the orphanage walls. On his list this year were four students, Caleb Triggs, Paul Moffett, Becky Cole and Selina Smith. A very high number as usually it was only one per year, two maximum. As always he was intrigued to see what the personalities of these new students, although he had already had a report from Ms Albury on her perceptions of the students, and indeed they were a diverse bunch.

He still had half an hour before he was expected so as always he went and sat on the bench near the doors and reread Ms Albury's report. Those who knew the man in the wizarding world may have found his actions odd, but indeed Albus Dumbledore did not like to act rashly, especially when there was the shaping of young minds at stake. Indeed it would be these kind of students who would be most in danger when Voldemort returned as Dumbledore knew he would.

_Dear Headmaster Dumbledore,_

_As you have requested I have compiled all my information on the children on the list of those who shall be attending your school. These being Caleb Triggs, Paul Moffett, Becky Cole and Selina Smith._

_Caleb Triggs joined us just two years ago after being transferred from several different care homes, due to his outbursts of magic. Caleb magical outburst primarily focused around protective force fields appearing around other children and indeed the people who were in charge of his care. Which is why it took him so long to come to us as although not explainable, it was not harmful or seen as particularly deviant. Caleb has been in the care system since he was a baby, as both his parents were killed in a house fire, and he has no other relatives. Although quiet, Caleb is a kind boy and a loyal friend, however this does mean that his friendships can lead him getting into minor acts of deviance, through their goading, such as sneaking out after bedtime. This said I do not believe there is anyone in this world who could push this child to hurt any living thing and he can easily be controlled with a firm word._

_Paul Moffett, joined us when he was six years old, after his first display of magic, Paul had only been in the foster system a year at this point after he was taken into our care when his mother became mentally unstable, his father is unknown. The magical display in question involved a book flying at the head of another child, who was believed to have been bullying him. He is a small boy, which often means he may become quite withdrawn from large groups. However, with those who do take the time to befriend him he is very popular. He is a very smart boy and works very hard in his studies, and none of us have any doubt that he will go far in life, for he is truly dedicated to his work._

_Becky Cole has been with us from birth, when her mother appeared on our doorstep in labour, unfortunately she died giving birth to Becky. Becky is a good girl and all the staff adore her, which at times may make her a target for other students, however she does not let them bother her. Becky is an extremely talented, pretty young girl who all adults adore, as do many her own age, excluding those that are jealous of her._

_Selina Smith joined her at the age of five, after having several magical outbursts in the year she had been In the system. Selina's parentage is unknown as she came into the system with a severe case of amnesia, although most guesses are that she had come from an abusive household, for when she was found she had extensive injuries. These injuries can affect Selina's health from time to time, causing her to be in acute pain, however she is getting increasingly better at dealing with the pain and does not let it hold her back. Selina's mental state can also be questionable, she would never hurt anyone however, she does very much like to be left alone and has quite a temper. Selina's magic is also one of the most powerful I have seen in the children that you have taken, especially when her emotions are high, although as with her pain she is getting increasingly better at controlling it. On occasion, Selina has also been known to suffer extreme nightmares, where she will wake up all nearby with piercing screams, thrashing in her bed, and sweating blood, although these are not as common as when she first came to our school. I realise this account of Miss Smith is quite grim, but I do hope it does not make you reconsider accepting her into your school, through all her pain she has a kind heart and I merely thought it prudent you be aware of what she is like at her worst. But I do believe she has the power to become a great witch, with the right training._

_Yours Sincerely_

_Ms Albury_

A diverse bunch indeed, Ms Albury's description wouldn't stop Dumbledore from accepting Miss Smith, although he had already shown Poppy this report, as he would with her head of house when she had been sorted. At his request Ms Albury had also provided him with the medical report done on Miss Smith, after assuring her that she would be accepted. Broken ribs, a broken wrist and ankle. She also had extensive wounds, which has bled profusely, leading to quite substantial blood loss. But it was what the muggle doctors couldn't identify that had made Albus pity the girl, as to an experienced wizard there were signs of multiple dark curses, including cruciatus. There was no doubt in his mind that her injuries were due to a previous acquaintance with the wizarding world and he hoped that returning to the magical world would not upset her. Looking at the time he saw it was time for him to go meet his new students.

Walking through the front doors he saw Ms Albury waiting for him, after exchanging the usual greetings, she showed him up to her office where his new students were sat. Ms Albury introduced him to each student in turn. Mr Moffett was sat with a book in his lap, his long brown hair covering his face. Next to Mr Moffett, was Mr Triggs, his smile was filled with joy and his eyes sparkled with a youthful innocence. The boys were as he had expected them to be but the girls were more of a surprise.

The much praised Miss Cole , indeed with her blonde hair and blue eyes she was very pretty, but he could see beyond that, her smile was fake, a lure to make her appear harmless, indeed her eyes did twinkle, but it was cold although she was plotting something. Miss Smith's eyes on the other hand looked, tired, they were eyes of someone who had seen much, indeed more than some had been through in a lifetime. Yet beneath that there was determination and courage, he would be highly surprised if she was sorted into any house but Gryffindor. Although he sensed she was hiding something, or it may just be she was extremely guarded, which would not entirely unexpected. Her smile at first glance seemed strained, yet when one looked more carefully, it was clearly genuine, as though a darkness was clouding her every happiness, but she could still focus on that happiness.

"Well I'm sure you know why I am here, you have all been invited to study at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and wizardry, I do not believe I need to explain it to you as its existence is common knowledge within these walls, but do you have any questions" There were a few question but mostly excitement, after explaining to the students that two professors would be coming to help them buy their supplies tomorrow he left them to absorb the news.


	2. Entering a World of Magic

**Entering a world of magic**

Selina wasn't surprised she was here; she had known she was a witch from the moment she was born, not that she could tell anyone else that. For the life of the girl that the world thought they knew, Selina Smith, began when she was four years old and she couldn't let anyone know otherwise. It was all part of her play-pretend; at least that was what she had said to herself when she was little. Her musings were interrupted by Becky squealing, about how wonderful this was and how special it made her feel. Selina couldn't understand why everyone liked her, she was so fake, her entire personality was a lie, and at least Selina only lied about her history. The joy radiating from Caleb on the other hand was true excitement, which was true to his character, as was Paul's hidden smile.

Once they were dismissed Selina headed down to the library, only to have the unfortunate realisation that Becky was following her. Selina had always tolerated Becky, but it seemed to drive her insane that Selina didn't fall for her act like everyone else did.

"So Selina can you believe that we'll both being going to Hogwarts? We should stick together; we'll probably end up being inseparable. You know how hard it is being an orphan, others just don't understand"

"I wouldn't get your hopes up Becky we may not even be in the same house; I'm going to the library to read, quietly_!"_

Becky dropped off from behind Selina, knowing that she hated people following her into the library, and it wasn't uncommon for those who did to be on the receiving end of her _accidental_ magic. Getting to the library Selina saw Caleb and Paul talking quietly in the corner and went over to sit with them, both smiled when they saw her approaching. She took her seat on the chair opposite the sofa on which they always sat and summoned a book to her, earning her a disapproving look from Paul.

"You know Headmaster Dumbledore said we weren't supposed to do magic outside of Hogwarts" Selina didn't say anything and the subject was dropped and the boys went back to discussing what it might be like going to Hogwarts.

That night Selina spent much of her time tossing and turning, trying to get to sleep, and like many nights before, she ended up wishing she hadn't. The memory came back to her, it felt as fresh as ever, and even though she told herself it wasn't real, it felt real. She could hear the screaming and feel the emotions run through her, emotions, the things that she had tried so hard to hide, even from herself. Then cold, like ice covered her and she bolted upright, ready to defend herself.

Above her she could see Ms Albury's worried face staring down at her, handing her a glass of water.

"You were screaming" she stated simply, "do you remember anything more?" Selina shook her head as always, her face regained its neutral expression and Ms Albury left her alone, knowing there was nothing she could do for her. She pulled out her book and kept reading, she could never go back to sleep after a nightmare, if she closed her eyes the memories would come flooding back.

As the sun rose Selina got showered and dressed and walked outside, she liked being outside, it felt a little more like being free, rather than being confined by walls. She sat on the wall looking out to the forest, it was beautiful as always, but many were wary of it, many had gone missing in that forest, although that did not necessarily mean they didn't go of their own free will. But what many didn't realise was that the muggle stories of 'creatures' wasn't far from the truth as Selina knew it was the home of a werewolf pack.

Walking into breakfast, she was the first there, but the room quickly filled up as more and more children woke up, and the noise level escalated. Selina was thankful that she had finished her breakfast before Becky got in so she couldn't sit with her; walking up to her room she decided to make sure that everything was ready. When it was nearly time to go, Selina levitated her case to go in front of her and took it down by the entrance. As she turned to go to the library she saw Caleb struggling with his so lifted it out of his hands, with magic and down next to her, noticing out of the corner of her eye that two people had walked in when the trunk was halfway towards her.

Once the trunk was down she turned to face the newcomers, it was clear that they were wizards from their state of dress. The woman, who looked strict with her pursed lips and mostly grey hair tied up in a bun, looked at her disapprovingly. The man on the other hand showed no emotion or interest, his eyes black as coal gave nothing away as his long black hair hid most of his face from view. It was the woman who spoke first.

"Young lady, I do hope you realise that students of Hogwarts, and all members of the wizarding world, must adhere to certain rules, and not doing magic outside of Hogwarts, when you are underage, is one of them"

"Yes, Miss" the woman didn't look at all impressed with Selina's response, but became more focused on making sure that everyone was gathered round. Checking behind her Selina saw Caleb and Paul, but there was no sign of Becky, she was always late as there was always something more important than what she was supposed to be doing. Five minutes after they were due at the entrance, Becky came strolling smiling brightly, and her smile was met with disapproving frowns from her new professors. Becky gave what Selina thought was a very false apology, and from the looks on their faces it didn't look like their new professors thought much of it either. Again it was the woman, who took the lead,

"Well, now that we are all finally assembled," she gave Becky a pointed look, which made Selina smile a little, "we can get started, now before we begin I believe introductions are in order, I am Professor McGonagall, I will teach you transfigurations and this is Professor Snape, our Potions Master, so which one of you is Mr Moffett?" Paul raised his hand and Professor McGonagall nodded and gave him a smile, "and that would make you Mr Triggs and Miss Smith?" Selina raised her hand and McGonagall gave her an amused smile whilst eyeing her trunk. "Well that just leaves Miss Cole, who finally decided to grace us with her present, albeit late." McGonagall's tone showed no room for comment so their trunks were shrunk and put into the Professor's pockets and they were off.

The tube ride was a quiet one into the centre of London and soon they reached a pub, known as the Leaky Cauldron, Dumbledore had told them that this was the gateway to the wizarding world. They walked through the pub with Professor McGonagall leading the group and Professor Snape bringing up the rear. Professor McGonagall highlighted to them the correct order to tap the bricks, and they moved away revealing a gateway into the wizarding world and what Selina knew would be the start of a whole new life for them all.

The wonders of Diagon alley were seen on the faces of all the children there was everything anyone could ever dream of, so much that you didn't know where to look first. Professor McGonagall gave the children a moment to absorb the sight and then lead them to a nearby café, where pumpkin juice was ordered for everyone, whilst she explained how the shopping would progress. Firstly she gave them their scholarship to buy their school things, it was at this stage that Selina pulled out a small bag she kept on her person at all time and informed the professors that she had had this on her when she was discovered. Inside Professor McGonagall was surprised to see well over 100 galleons, but could see no reason to confiscate them from Miss Smith so gave it back and told her to use it wisely.

Selina in turn split the twenty galleons she had been given as her scholarship money, between the others, keeping the remaining two galleons for herself. Professor McGonagall then proceeded to tell them the order in which they would be shopping. First they would be going to the cauldron shop and the apothecary, the stationary shop, Flourish and Blotts, then to the second hand robe shop and Ollivander's to get their wands. Finally she informed them that they would be going to Gringotts bank, so that they could each open an account in which their school scholarship would go every year.

The drinks were quickly finished and the shopping began, to save time Professor Snape decided to go get the cauldrons whilst the others were in the apocathary, earning him a disapproving scowl from Professor McGonagall. The shopping was a very dull affair to Selina's mind, although there was a slightly amusing outburst from Becky, who didn't like the fact she would be wearing second hand robes. During which time Professor McGonagall pointed out that Selina could in fact buy some brand new robes if she wanted, but Selina had managed to find some second hand robe that fit her and looked new so decided to save her money. After all Professor McGonagall had briefly pointed out the Quidditch shop and Selina thought she may very well like to buy her own broom. When they entered Ollivander's, the owner gave them all warm smiles and asked who would be getting their wand first.

Becky went to the counter to get her wand whilst the others sat down and watched. Selina couldn't help but wonder the type of wand that would chose her, after all it was said to truly represent a person's character. What wood would it be, would it be unyielding or springy, and what would the core be, all these questions went through Selina's mind until her turn arrived. The first wand Mr Ollivander pulled out, flew right out of Selina's hand, the second broke the vase on the far side of the desk. By the time it arrived to the third wand Selina was apprehensive, she didn't have a good feeling about this wand it was a 13 ½ inch yew, but Selina didn't trust it. She cautiously took it into her hand and dropped it quickly as it burned her hand. Looking down at her palm she saw an angry red mark, which Professor McGonagall was quick to heal, with a concerned look on her face.

Mr Ollivander seemed to be struggling to find a wand for her until he turned and looked at her with a questioning look and went further into the store and came out with another wand.

"Willow, but quite unyielding this one, eleven inches, but it is the core that makes this wand so unique. Give it a try?" Looking at the wand Selina felt a pull in her chest and thought this may very well be the wand for her, taking it into her hand she felt a warm sensation run over her and felt as though her arm was complete, like this had always been what she had been missing but she had never known it.

"Indeed, we can expect great things from you Miss Smith. For this wand is the oldest in my collection, and I remember every wand. But this one is before my time, it was my father that acquired it into the shop, and if legend is to be believed, this wand may be as old as Hogwarts itself. Indeed its craftsmanship does support such legends as does its core. You see Miss Smith in times gone by wand cores were made more powerful by infusing them with different ingredients, especially if they could be bonded with opposites. You see the core in itself is a rarity, a single hair from a lion's mane, soaked in basilisk venom, to give it the desired length, a powerful wand indeed Miss Smith, use it well."

There was an eerie silence in the group as they walked out of Ollivander's and towards Gringotts, Selina kept her new wand in her hand, letting what Mr Ollivander had said wash over her. A wand as old as Hogwarts itself, made using a mix of the two rival houses, it truly was a unique wand meant for great things, and Selina was determined to live up to the expectations. Indeed Selina could not help but speculate on how this wand may very well be showing both her past and very likely her future.

Walking into Gringotts a goblin was waiting for them, although he didn't seem happy to see them, although Selina wasn't overly surprised, after all they were orphans, they couldn't expect to be getting much gold from the for the foreseeable future. The goblin, Griphook, took their details with little interest, until he got to Selina and saw the galleons she wanted to put in her vault, it wasn't a fortune, but it was more than any of the others, so his behaviour to her was more polite.

After their Gringotts accounts had been opened and they had their keys, Professor McGonagall took them into the Leaky Cauldron so they could have dinner and discusses life at Hogwarts. It was a fairly quiet dinner as everyone was thinking about their own paths, apart from Becky who could not stand the quiet. Paul was the one to ask the first question of substance,

"Professors, you know the spells that wizards use for everyday things like cooking and cleaning, are they taught at Hogwarts, or do we have to learn them ourselves?" Professor McGonagall was the one to speak; Professor Snape didn't seem interested in conversation, or anything to do with the children.

"Well Mr Moffett, some of the spells that you will use in your adult everyday life will be taught at Hogwarts, however most are simply a matter of finding the incantation in a book. You won't be any worse off than any of the other students though, as many of them only get the books and learn them when they need them, which is often long after they have left Hogwarts." The conversation then went back to things of little substance, led by solely by Becky.

Once dinner was finished everyone went up to their rooms, and much to Selina's displeasure she and Becky were sharing. It was only six, so it was too early for her to even feign sleep, so she decided to bury herself in one of her school books. Whenever Becky would say anything, Selina would respond with the simplest of answers, which annoyed Becky to no end until she huffed and eventually pulled out a book of her own, although she didn't look thrilled about reading it.

Sun poked through the windows waking Selina, she had fallen asleep reading, looking at her watch she saw that it was, half six. Getting up she decided to take the book she had been reading the night before and go down and get some breakfast. Walking down she saw that a number of people were already up and about, at one table to the side, she saw Professor Snape sitting drinking a cup of coffee. She ordered some toast and went and sat on the same table as him, he raised his eyes to look at her but gave her no other greeting. The book she had brought down was one of her potions texts and she hoped he didn't think she'd picked it up to try to impress him. Shortly after seven Paul slid in next to her and pulled out his own book, and before long was waving his hand round practicing the movements needed for different spells.

"Try to make sure you do the movement in one Mr Moffett, you'll find that when it comes to performing the spell you'll have much more success that way" said Professor McGonagall, as she sat down. The next down the stairs was Caleb, who looked even more excited than he usually did and came over with a full English breakfast grinning from ear to ear and a bounce in his step.

"Today's the day, we're going to Hogwarts, I can't wait!" Selina and Paul simply looked at each other and smiled, Caleb's happiness was contagious. When Caleb had finished his breakfast, he went on to excitedly explain all that he had learnt about Hogwarts from his reading the night before in Hogwarts a History. Selina engaged him happily, as did Paul, they chatted until it reached half eight and Selina got up from her seat.

"I better go get Becky up, last thing we need is her slowing us down." Professor McGonagall looked at the time and replied,

"Miss Cole still has time to get up, and she will have to get herself out of bed when she is at Hogwarts, so I suggest you let her sleep, if she oversleeps and has to rush it will be a good lesson for her." Selina sat down and smiled, Becky clearly wasn't doing well at making the adults of the wizarding world fall in love with her, perhaps she was losing her touch. Caleb began questioning Professor McGonagall about Hogwarts about everything from the founders to the Professors, the layout to the lessons. The descriptions Professor McGonagall gave were detailed and entertaining and even Selina became absorbed in all they were being told.

The grandfather clock struck half nine just as Becky came running down in her pyjamas, and started shovelling food in her mouth.

"Why didn't you wake me Selina? I still have to have a shower!" Selina rolled her eyes, but before she could answer Professor McGonagall answered for her,

"Miss Cole, it is your own responsibility to get yourself out of bed and no one else's. Now I suggest you eat and change quickly for we will be leaving in twenty five minutes, regardless of your state of dress." Selina smirked, as Becky gave her a dirty look, Becky liked things to revolve around her and it was becoming clear that the wizarding world wouldn't. At five to ten Caleb, Paul and Selina went upstairs to get their trunks; Becky hadn't been seen since she stomped upstairs after her hurried breakfast. Walking into her room Selina saw that Becky was ready and just brushing her hair, when she saw Selina entering the room she turned away, clearly making a point of ignoring her, which didn't bother Selina in the slightest.

Once everyone was downstairs they set off through the streets of London, onto the underground, and straight into Kings Cross train station. They walked down the platform and once they were half way down the platform, Professor McGonagall spoke to them in a hushed voice,

"To enter platform 9 ¾ where you will catch the train each year, you simply have to walk through the pillar between platforms 9 and 10, be sure to do it discreetly as not to attract the attention of muggles. We look forward to seeing you all at the sorting ceremony this afternoon." With that Professor McGonagall and Professor Snape, headed towards the exit. Looking at the others Selina gave a nod to say she'd go first. She picked up some speed whilst approaching the wall, trusting that it would work. Closing her eyes as she went though she felt the air around her change, then she saw it the Hogwarts express, she waited for the boys and the three of them found a compartment and sat down. The whistle blew and before they knew it the train had set off, off for Hogwarts, the beginning of a new chapter in all their lives.


End file.
